Don't Try This At Home, Kids!!

At first glance, you'd think these were just a couple of normal harmless rocks, right? Wrong. As a poor woman from Orange County CA found out yesterday, these are actually evil rocks. She found them while taking a nice walk on the beach, happily minding her own business. She must have thought her kids would like them, so she picked them up and placed them in her pocket. Later on at home, she was standing in her kitchen fixing lunch when her fucking shorts caught on fire. Her husband suffered 2nd-degree burns trying to get the shorts off of her; she suffered both 2nd and 3rd degree burns, right down to her hip bone in places. But that didn't end the story--as the husband got the shorts off, the rocks fell out onto the kitchen floor and the goddamn FLOOR caught on fire! What the hell kind of fucked-up rocks do they have on that beach?! The Navy has decided they will check that area of the ocean because there *may* have been some type of military activity gone awry there; in other words, what kind of shit did they spill???

It's a sad day on this planet when you can't even trust a ROCK on the ground to behave the way it's supposed to! What's next, trees eating people? Lesson kids: Sticks & stones just *might* break your bones. Or cause you to spontaneously combust.

The Year Of The Dragon

So 2012 is the year of the dragon...interestingly enough, it began this year on January 23rd, my son's birthday, which is also the zodiac symbol for the year he was born! And more interesting than that, the dragon is the animal that Aaron has always identified the most strongly with--he calls it his spirit animal. Amazing & spooky! I found out that I was born in the Year of the Horse--and the horse has always been my favorite animal....I think the Chinese were onto something there. It's awesome to think that we humans all started out on basically the same societal level (rocks & sticks), and we have managed to evolve and change into so many variations---with wildly different customs, languages, belief systems, etc. 

I hope this year will be the one that turns our lives around; so far it has been looking up for us. Even though our Burmese python did become pregnant by our ball python and then reabsorbed the eggs, good things have still happened. It looks like we will soon be able to move from this wretched crappy place where we've been stuck for 6 years, too. That has us more than excited--we are feeling a sense of hope for the future which is something we haven't felt in a VERY long time. I'm hoping I'll be able to have the surgery I so desperately need by the end of this year, so my health will improve. I think we've suffered long enough; maybe karma agrees.

Happy Mother's Day---NOT

 

I began a Mother's Day post yesterday--only it was intended to be aimed at people who have a shitty mother. I knew what I was going to say and everything; but as I got into the memories, it just shut me down. For all the good mothers out there, it seems there are many more who aren't; I ended up getting all depressed and scrapped the whole thing. 

Mother's Day is painful for me now; although I myself am a mother and I've worked so hard to be the opposite of the mother I knew, still I am always reminded that I have no one to look up to who fills that hole in my heart. My mother is dead, although her body still breathes and others call her by that title. Every time I think I'm done grieving over the loss of something I now know I never really had--my mother's unconditional love--I am hit once again. I guess that pain will always be lurking, ready to make itself known.

Women, Would You?

What grown woman would wear jewelry sculpted to look like food? Bitches, please.

Game Of Thrones Recap: Best. Show. EVER!!!

*Spoilers ahead*

Game of Thrones (or as I now fondly call it, The Peter Dinklage Show because his portayal of Tyrion has totally stolen it, along with Arya) is my favorite!! Last nights' episode was great, too--I have to say that when Osha went to Theon Greyjoy to "serve" him, I was pissed at her. Seeing how he treated her last season and how he treats women in general, I couldn't understand it; then at the end, when she and Hodor escaped with the 2 Stark boys and their dire wolves? All was right in my world (until someone stole Dany's dragons, that is). Really, though--didn't all of us--who haven't read the books yet--expect this to happen? As tough as Dany is, she is still young and learning; she didn't even realize Ser Jorah was in love with her--even after that giant dude told her so. I really hated to see her faithful people murdered too; they went through hell with her and out the other side. Whoever did this will PAY though--I have NO doubt. Dany will open a can of whoop-ass on Qarth that'll make them scream for their mommies. Cannot WAIT.

The parts where they showed Jon Snow were kinda boring this week; I'm happy he gets to be a Ranger and all, and I love his character, but there is so much happening everywhere else that I wanted to fast-forward his part to get to the good stuff! I don't get Sansa, though; when Joffrey had her in the throne room an episode or two back, humiliating her in public, WHY did she not take Tyrion's offer to break the engagement?! Is it because she wants to get revenge on Joffrey & Cersei herself? I think Arya & Jaqen H’ghar (mmm sexy) will have that part covered--and the Arya/Jaqen storyline is my favorite, along with Tyrion/Bronn.

Tyrion needs to watch out--I have a bad feeling that his hidden girlie is doomed. You know Cersei is gonna fuck her up to get Tyrion back for shipping her daughter away! I'm hating it already, but man--what kind of changes will it make in Tyrion's character? Ooh, counting the days already until Sunday!!

Let's Talk About Jack Reacher/Tom Cruise....

If you're a Lee Child fan (as I am), you have surely heard of this story; the first Jack Reacher book, which is now being made into a movie, will star TOM CRUISE in the role of our beloved Reacher. Omg. Words cannot adequately express the fuckery contained in that one sentence. Out of the plethora of reasons why this should not be happening in our universe (see: universe-ending paradoxes), I am hard-pressed to choose the one that stands out as the most ridiculous, so here is a list in no particular order:
1. Jack Reacher is 6 foot 5 inches tall!! Even wearing his special lifts, TC  is still shorter than Reacher's shadow.
2. Jack Reacher weighs 250 pounds! TC's ego weighs more, but since egos are invisible, um no.
3. Jack Reacher is beloved the world over; kicks ass, takes names, and makes no excuses to the women he loves and leaves. TC's career is waning, he's a member of a cult, and he's afraid of vagina.
4. Jack Reacher is a supreme example of male brute strength & awesomeness (yes, that is TOO a word!), TC can't even reach the punch bowl down for you from that cabinet over the refrigerator without a stepladder.


There is a page on Facebook called "TC is not Jack Reacher"; the guy who started it is pretty pissed about this too--check it out! Although we cannot stop what has already happened, we fans CAN make a difference by refusing to see the movie with this casting. Hollywood needs to know that when it comes to this beloved book series, fans are much more discerning than those who flock to see the Twi-tard movies. We are not love-struck teens, dammit! Fans of Jack Reacher demand a higher quality of movie--to go along with the amazing quality of books that Lee Child writes. 

*climbs down from soapbox*

Out of the Blue

It's poetry time:

Out of the Blue

I never saw it coming 

It hit so hard and fast

Love got my world a spinning 

And blew away the past

I was minding my own business

Wasn't looking for the fall

But when I laid my eyes upon you 

I knew I had to give my all.

And finally, when you were mine

I guess I missed my cue

Cause I came home and you were gone

It came from out of the blue.

So let's don't play the blame game

It's much too late for that

But if seeing is believing

Pull the rabbit from the hat

If we could only resurrect

The love we shared before

You'd be all I ever needed

I'd never ask for more.

Sitting in this empty house

Wondering what to do 

I heard the knock upon the door

And out of the blue, it was you.

Kim B

 4 March, 2002

Google hates me

I have had the same email address for years--until 2 months ago; it kept getting hacked so I went to Gmail and apparently this is where I screwed up. 

Got my new email set up using the name of our soon-to-be snake-breeding business (Angelic Herps), imported all my contacts from hotmail, and started my blog. All was well...for a few weeks. Then my perfectly capable son decided he wanted to use my email address too and that's when I knew. Google & kids just don't mix. So then I get irritated because every time I opened my email, I had to delete out his daily 19+ Facebook notifications, and his video game emails, etc. One new gmail address later--and I swear it's the last one!) and I discovered I could not import my contacts into the new account. Why? Because Gmail is the devil, that's why.

Which means I had to start my blog over again, because I'm teaching blogger to my own damn self and I still have a lot to learn. I was just becoming somewhat proficient on the old site, only to find that they're changing it up. *sigh*

Job hunting....oh what fun!

No matter what type of work you do, job-hunting is hard; it seems like there are ever-more increasing hoops to jump through, just to get an interview! I remember when I was a teenager/young adult, there were simple one-page applications and you could be working within a week of applying. It is a very different story now. There are drug tests, physicals, background checks, credit checks--and it is very common to go through all these tests and then still not get the job, even if you pass.

Then if you DO manage to get the job, there are more dangers lurking; job discrimination, bullying, sexual harassment, worry that a co-worker might show up with a gun and shoot you. Or how about poor Debbie Stevens, who gave her boss a kidney, and the bitch still fired her for missing work!! I have come to the conclusion that this world is a very fucked-up place, and getting weirder every day.